don't worry about that paper
don't worry about that assignment
about that midterm
and that midterm
and that midterm

because grades shouldn't define me but somehow they still do

My A's are fading fast and all I can think of are the days when this was easier.
easier to write
easier to sleep
and much much easier to talk to him.


I almost talked to him 3 times but for some reason I kept walking.

I take routes to make our paths cross but then I do nothing about it.

It's almost funny how nervous I get and how butterflies are my constant companion now

but now I don't have time to go on canyon drives and watch the blood moon because my F's are more important than my friends right now.

which is a problem.

I have a problem.

because I never get enough sleep but I tell my mom I do

because I stare at the mountains when I'm driving and almost crash every time

because I care more about how my clothes are hung up than what time it is

because I buy a candle every time I go shopping

because if I'm not doing anything I get so overwhelmed to the point of tears

because I manage to write my emails instead of my papers

but how can I write papers when he comes home in 8 months and he just hit his year mark and he has 657 days left.

I need more hours in the day and good food and my I need my friends back and just one day to myself and a long shower



and I need a plant.



only you can understand that.